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I don’t feel anger that often. I can count my anger episodes in 1 hand. Sure, I have many episodes of pissed off but those are just minor annoyances and go away after 3 seconds. They are more of a gut reaction than actual anger.

Today reminds me how anger felt like. Anger is not gut reaction, it comes from something tangible. It’s a problem that do no go away after 5 seconds because it’s an issue you feel strongly about and you can’t solve it. Your body is shaking and things go through your head because you try to rationalize why the other party did what he/she did but it makes no sense because what they did is truly stupid and unknowingly affect others in unimaginable ways. The rationale is always ignorance so you know they don’t have any bad intention but the shit they did is so bad that intent doesn’t matter. The ignorance just make it worst because they have zero idea why they are in the wrong and no one can convince them otherwise.

Anger stems from irreparable damage, you are angry because shit is already fucked and you can’t do a single shit about it. The hopelessness is deafening and you tried everything but it won’t go away.  That’s legit anger. It’s probably a good emotion to have because it’s a reminder that there are shit that are irreparable and instead of being apathetic, you try to attack it aggressively.  Of course, it might all be futile aggressiveness but at least you tried to solve it and who knows, things might not be a irreparable as you thought.

With this episode, now I understand protestors and have a deeper appreciation of successful protests. I won’t go into the detail on what I am angry about but it’s related to how a team mate did something unnecessary and jeopardize the whole social balance and mood of the team. Now all the team mates probably hate him and he doesn’t seem to notice it.


Actually I get porno fanart because I am a big perv who read tons of hentai manga. However, I really have zero idea why hentai of mickey mouse exist. People get off on that? Cool, who am I to judge because I read Uziga Waita. Actually, what I don’t get is the psyche of anyone who drew lewd stuff of characters, especially innocent as shit one like my little pony and mickey mouse. I kinda understand how the twist of appearing to be innocent but is actually sex positive can be erotic but mickey mouse? Really? Never in my life where I had any thoughts of wanting to draw any lewd art, especially not pony with vagina.It’s interesting how one day, someone will get up and feel compel to draw penis on a cartoon mouse. It makes no sense to me.

Is it because I have zero drawing talent and how if I am talented, I will get it because it seems like artists really love drawing lewd stuff. Anecdotally, all the illustrators I know love to draw something lewd for god knows why. All of them somehow lean towards it and that’s how we got tons of sexualized comics and fanarts. Do you honestly believe that Wonder Woman was drew like that because sex sell? No! Dude is just someone who love S&M bondage stuff and most of them are pervy like that.

No one told Gainax artists to draw bouncing boobs. They just draw it for fun and tons of artists agree it’s a great idea and follow it up with zero collusion. It’s this idea of how anyone could think that drawing big bouncy boobs is fun that I find fascinating. Sure, I can understand how it might be fun after I know it exists but I am intrigued by how anyone could come up with it in the first place.

I tried to search on google of why artists are pervy and love to draw lewd art but got no result. I thought it will be interesting to understand the psyche of them but I can’t find anything. Seriously, I am not condemning or think they are bad, I am just really fascinated by what drove them and why a huge subset of artists are like that. I know this blog has no reader but I really hope some one can share their experience on this trend of artist drawing lewd art. I think a good story can be told with that.

My guess is that artists are very creative individuals and they love to explore abstract and outlandish ideas and sex is exactly that. It’s alluring to them because it’s shocking and artists love to differ from the norm so lewd arts are their statements of being a deviant. They hate establishment, love freedom of expression and they feel that sex is this culturally repressed shit so they want to unlock it to make the ultimate expression of freedom. They feel they could successfully free this culturally repressed beast by drawing lewd art.At least, that’s my conclusion and it sounds good so I will go along with it.

I have seen a fair share of excellent opinions on cartoon but I have never read any good debate on the merit or demerit of it, why? Because all of it is subjective and it doesn’t matter in the end.

I was watching Lindsey Graham talking to Trevor Noah and they were debating on issues with radicalized Islam and they ended the debate in an amicable standstill of agree to disagree. Issues on radicalized Islam from a senator is serious shit with serious repercussions and they could end it by agreeing to disagree because both of them are smart enough to know that they can’t convince one another and no one really knows who’s right or wrong.

This is why it boggles my mind when people are so invested in proving the other party is wrong when it comes to opinion of a cartoon. Firstly, it won’t affect anything if one side is wrong, and secondly, it’s really very difficult to be wrong with subjective opinions on entertainment.

Enjoyment derived from entertainment has lots of nuance and abstractions. Most of the time, it’s just getting the right thing at the right time. For example, I thought Gundam 08th MS Team has stale dialogs and the motivation of why anyone is fighting anyone can be stronger or clearer but I was in the mood of watching a well animated show on robots fighting robots with some star crossed lover shit thrown in so I liked it.

Gundam Wing has shoddy character motivation, I still don’t know what Treize is thinking. Does he like war? Why? If he likes war, why did he strive for peace at the end? Why even start off duping the Gundam pilots to kill off a shuttle of peace loving decision makers? It was foreshadowed that he was some arm dealer for some cartel but what he did later on contradicts all of that. It’s not made clear what’s his motivation is, his nonsensical speech on beautiful battles and stuff are weird as fuck too. That’s just one of the many issues of Gundam Wing have. Other issues include people saying awkward dramatic lines and acting edgy as fuck at inappropriate time, Relena falling in love with an asshole who wants to kill her, and the constant glorification of suicide by making it a cool to self destruct.

Even with all that, I genuinely enjoyed the show because they are very serious with their nonsense. It’s a bunch of crazy people doing crazy shit and everyone in the universe think what they said made sense.

The cool battles scenes help too. I also find the edginess that appeal to your chuuni teenagers to be very interesting. It helps me look back on why I love stuff like these back then. The whole mentality of having thoughts that these are some mature deep shit even though they are all juvenile is interesting!

This is why if anyone asked me for why I love Gundam Wing, it will be pretty difficult t0 justify because I like it in-spite of  its flaws. The whole reason can be boiled down to nuance and watching it at the right time with the right mindset. Any other day with any expectation of watching a good show, I would probably hate it like Code Geass because lots of flaws of Code Geass I hate are the same things I enjoyed in Gundam Wing.

So how do you describe this experience to anyone without looking like a crazy person? You can’t but that’s how people enjoyed most of the stuff they watched. They just likes the experience because it appeals to their primal instinct, it’s culminations of abstract feelings and concept so it’s difficult to explain.

One more things that I wanted to add. I stated that Gundam Wing has some cool stuff in it, namely the Gundam battles and design but another person might think they look like shit and are way too overpowered! That is a very valid opinion but the Gundam being overpowered is why I love it. I love what you hate and no one can say the other side is wrong so how do you even go about arguing stuff like these?

This is why most debate on merit of cartoons are boiled down to that, some people find some traits of the characters interesting while I think the characters are stupid for the very same reason. There’s nothing to debate about because I can’t get into your mind and feel what you feel so no conclusion can be made. There’s no right to wrong and even if there’s, it’s not even that important of an issue to make sure you get it right so there’s no point.

Putting it in perspective, what will happen if someone thinks that Legend of Galactic Heroes is boring as fuck for whatever reason that you might think is stupid? Nothing, yes nothing! You can make the argument how they are intellectual lazy or some shit but it does not matter at the end of the day because we are not talking about decisions that will affect people’s life in anyway! Unless the topic is about how all ice cream should just be chocolate and caramel sauce on ice cream is a sin because sweet on sweet is fucking disgusting and causes diabetes.



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